Free Shipping
by TheLightningrodAuthor
Summary: Through a series of unlikely events, one simple journal gets sent all around the world, collecting strange entries for the next recipient to read and pass along. Just... just read. Just read to find out. On indefinite hiatus.
1. Dipper

**This fic is the result of me laying awake at 11:00 PM. Enjoy!**

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><p>Dipper walked out of James's and Jean's Bookstore with a plastic bag in his hand and a smile on his face. He was looking forward to this book, as he had been wanting to get his hands on it for a while now.<p>

When he got back to the Mystery Shack, he ran into his room and jumped onto his bed, opening his book to the first page.

It was blank. Dipper Pines had purchased a journal.

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><p>A half hour later, Dipper had his first journal entry completed:<p>

_Entry #1- Dipper Pines:_

_Nothing too special happened today, surprisingly. Other than going to the store to buy the book I'm currently writing in, it's been a very boring day. Let's see..._

_I stopped Gideon from enslaving the lobsters at the Under the Sea restaurant._

_Mabel managed to bezazzle the lock on every door leading out of the Shack, so we have to climb out the windows now._

_Stan has set up traps to shoot Nyarf darts at anyone who enters the living room and disturbs him watching The Dutchess Approves for the seventh time._

_Soos is currently stuck in a window, and I believe he is fighting a squirrel for the nut it's holding._

_Wendy is texting with the gang in the gift shop while balancing ten quarters she stole from the cash register on her nose._

_Gideon is outside the Shack trying to get close enough to smell Wendy's hair through the gift shop window._

_Gompers managed to rip off Gideon's left pant leg and is now driving him off the property._

_Robbie is playing his guitar outside and just tripped over Gideon._

_Thompson is playing Dancy Pants Revolution over in the arcade._

_Manly Dan is uprooting a tree for the fun of it._

_Pacifica is laughing while talking on her phone and just spilled the nail polish she was applying to her fingers._

_Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland are racing to fit doughnuts on their batons._

_Tyler is laughing seemlessly about nothing._

_So, to sum up, just an average day here in Gravity Falls, Oregon._

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><p>Dipper closed the journal and smiled once more at his work. He heard his name being called, so he tossed it aside and hurried downstairs. He slammed the door behind him, causing the journal to fall into a box about the same size and out the open window.<p>

As the mailman approached the Shack, the wind kicked up, and an address stamp flew out of his bag and stuck onto the box containing the journal. The box landed in the mailman's hands and he read the address aloud:

_The Park House_

_91382 Park Way_

_The City, __Arizona_


	2. Mordecai

**Here's Chapter 2! The journal makes its way south to Arizona. Please R&R!**

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><p>"Mordecai! Rigby!" Benson yelled. "I've had enough of your video games! Go work the snack bar!"<p>

"Aw, what?"

"But, Benson, the sunlight is bad for our skin!" Rigby objected. "We might get burned! It's a madhouse out there, I'm telling you."

"If you get burned, buy some lotion out of your own paycheck. Now go!"

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><p>"Man, this sucks," Rigby moaned.<p>

"You're telling me!" Mordecai accused. "I wasn't even playing video games!"

"You were too!"

"No way."

"You so were!"

The two were so busy arguing that they didn't notice the mailman walk up to the counter.

"Hey, do you guys live at the Park House?" he asked them once they stopped fighting.

"Yeah," Mordecai said.

The mailman handed him a box. "This is for you."

Mordecai raised an eyebrow. "Who's it from?"

"How should I know? I'm not supposed to look through people's mail."

"Good point," Mordecai admitted. "Thanks for the box, I guess."

The man nodded, then left.

Mordecai opened the box and found a journal inside. "What the-"

"Dude, read it!" Rigby urged. "It might be a girl's!"

"So what if it's a girl's?" Mordecai returned. "We don't know where this person lives."

"You're such a stick in the mud." Rigby turned away and started cozying up to the pretzels.

Mordecai looked at the journal again and opened it, taking a seat on the counter. When he was done reading it, he couldn't stop laughing.

"What?"

"This kid has such a weird life!" Mordecai managed to say.

"Oh, yeah, because we don't."

"No, I'm serious!" Mordecai began reading aloud: "Bezazzled doorknobs, doughnut-crazed cops, hair-sniffing kids..."

"Wow, that is weird," Rigby conceded.

Mordecai grabbed a pen off the counter, sat down, opened the journal to a fresh page, and began to write his own entry.

_Entry #2- Mordecai Quintel:_

_I'm kind of new to the whole journal thing, but I'll give it my best shot._

_This week's been sort of normal by our standards. We lost a bowling match in which CJ and I had an awkward re-meeting, but it turned out fine._

_Except we lost. That part kind of sucked._

_After that, Benson locked himself in his office for five whole days. We had to slide him food under the door, but all he got was dirty, undercooked pancakes since that's all that could fit. When he finally left, he had a slight stubble, and he smelled like rotting sugar. I wonder why._

Mordecai finished his entry and smiled, closing the journal and setting his pen down.

"Dude!"

"Ah!"

"Finally!" Rigby yelled. "I've been calling your name for ten minutes! Benson is waiting for us to come back!"

"Ok, ok," Mordecai said, following Rigby and leaving the journal behind.

Five minutes later, Thomas entered the snack bar, temporarily replacing Mordecai and Rigby. He picked up the journal, shrugged, and went to find Skips to see if he could figure out who it belonged to.

When he entered Skips's house, he was barely surprised to see a swirling portal on the side of the wall.

"Hey, Skips," he said. "I need help finding out who this journal belongs-" He was cut short when he tripped and the journal flew into the portal, causing it to close on itself.

"What have you done?!" Skips yelled. He skipped up to the wall and began feeling where the portal had been.

"Where does that lead to?" Thomas asked.

Skips closed his eyes and concentrated on the wall, then finally read out an address:

_Crystal Temple_

_7987 Tidal Road_

_Beach City, California_


	3. Steven

**Yet another installment of the journal's travels! It's heading out to California this time! Who will find it this time? Please R&R!**

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><p>"Hey, Pearl!" Steven called, walking around the house. "Garnet! Amethyst!" He put his hands on his hips. "Hm."<p>

"Hey, Lion!" he yelled, approaching the large pink feline. "Do you know where the Gems went?"

Lion shook his head.

"Aw, man." Steven fell onto his back. "This is boring."

Suddenly the temple shook. He stood up, ran out the front door, and looked up to the top of the temple. Another quake came, and a portal opened above the head of the goddess. Steven gasped and ran back inside, taking the stairs to the top of the house. He began climbing up the statue, and he reached one of the hands just as something flew out of the portal, causing the portal to close. It landed in the statue's other hand, and Steven went to see what it was.

"What the-" Steven picked up the item and inspected it. It appeared to be a journal. He took it back inside and sat down next to Lion, and when he opened it he found that there were two other entries inside, each by different people. "I guess it's a chain thing. Maybe I should write in it too." He looked at Lion. "What do you think?"

_"I think you should write in it, Steven,"_ Steven voiced for Lion.

"Ok, then I will," he replied to himself. "Thanks, Lion!"

He grabbed a pen, opened the journal, and began writing:

_Entry #3- Steven Universe:_

_Nothing too special happened today, so I'll go back to yesterday. The four of us- or, five with Lion- warped to this weird four-seasons-themed place. I mean, it literally had all four seasons it it, each separated into its own section. We each had to split up, although Pearl needed some convincing from Garnet that I'd be fine. In the end, Amethyst took summer, Garnet took winter, and Pearl took autumn. I took spring, of course, but the compromise was that I had to go with Lion, which I had no problem with._

_When we entered the spring section, we saw that it was a paradise-type place. The main shape, as there was in most of the places we visited, was a diamond. The clouds in the sky, the tiles we walked on, and even the plants we walked on were all shaped like diamonds._

_As we progressed, the plants began to get thicker and thicker. Finally, we reached a point where the plants seemed to be a bit hostile._

_Or maybe a lot hostile._

_Because they attacked us._

_Luckily, that tipped us off that the gem was somewhere around there. Lion actually spotted it first- a green diamond as big as my face on a weathered piece of stone at the end of the pathway. In a mode of panic, I began playing my ukulele, which seemed to calm the plants. So while I played them a song about the color red I had written last year, Lion used the time to retrieve the gem. Then we ran for our lives back to the starting point, where we found Garnet covered in snow, Amethyst scorched all over, and Pearl covered in cuts from leaves. In the end, I learned that spring is my favorite season._

Steven finished is entry and smiled. "That was fun." He looked at Lion. "Remember that?"

_"I still wished we could have taken winter."_

"Yeah, oh well." Steven got up and pointed to the door. "Come on, Lion. Let's go get some fish pizza!"

After they left, Amethyst warped back into the house and saw a note left by Steven that said he went to get pizza. Typical. She picked up the journal under note and sighed. "I guess he left his journal thing here. I'd better go give it back."

She walked out the front door and slid down the hill, morphing into a cat and hitting the ground running. Once she got to the more inhabited part of Beach City, she was a few blocks away from the pizza shop when she ran into someone. Being how small she was, she flew up into the air and morphed back to her regular form in surprise. She fell back down and... was caught.

She looked into the eyes of the long-haired mailman who had just caught her.

"Oh, hey Amethyst," Jamie said. "Didn't expect to see you here. Now."

It took her a while to respond; she couldn't get past his warm, cute brown eyes.

She then realized that she had dropped the journal. When she spotted it, it was too late- it was slowly sliding into mailbox nearby, with one of Jamie's postage stamps on the corner:

_Carter Residence_

_Apartment M, 12105 Starch Avenue_

_Manhattan, New York City, New York_

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><p><strong>I liked that ending! In case I failed, that end part was an attempt at romance between Jamie and Amethyst. I'm kind of bad at writing romance.<strong>

**Thank you for bearing with me!**


End file.
